Joey West
On Golfing Blindly.

I've always been amazed at blind golfers. I've seen one-armed golfers, paraplegic golfers and deaf and dumb golfers. But it's the blind golfers that amaze me. Charley Boswell was America's best known blind golf champion. He used to intimidate his opponents by saying things like "That's the worst swing I ever heard" or "I'm glad you see the hazards on this course -- they'd scare the hell out of me!"

Do you remember the old joke about when Arnold Palmer was challenged to a match by a blind golfer? The blind golfer told Arnie to pick the day and the course. He'd pick the time.

"Sure," said Palmer, "we'll play at Sawgrass next Tuesday."

"Great," said the blind champion. "Tuesday at Sawgrass it is. I'll call for a tee time. We shouldn't have a problem getting one around midnight!"

The Funniest Game:

Execution:
What must a golfer shoot to assure tournament victory? --The rest of the players.

Tipsy:
"If you're drinking, don't drive. Don't even putt." --Dean Martin

Profound:
If golf is good exercise, why isn't mowing the lawn?

Bare Fact:
Women were once prohibited from topless sunbathing at Wellingsborough Golf Club in England because one golfer complained the distraction caused him to lose control of his putter.