So I'm watching the British Open on the telly (see, I speak British) with my buddy Mike Malone from Alabama and he says: "Is that a golf course? Looks like the cow pastures we have back in 'Bama."

Reminded me of Sam Snead's quote when he first saw the course: "Down home, we wouldn’t plant cow beets on something like that."

Fouteen greens serve two holes -- what, the cheap Scots didn't want to spring for more greens? And what's the deal with No. 18? Everybody but Michelle Wie is driving it. Golf has been played for 500 years at St. Andrews -- will somebody please come out and say technology has made the Old Course obsolete?

After one day, I'm about "revered" out. If TNT had said "revered" one more time, I think I would have thrown up. The piece on Bobby Jones would have made a statue weep.

I think if something gets old enough, it automatically qualifies as "revered." And there's no doubt everything about the Old Course is old, from the old course to Old Tom Morris to the old Royal and Ancient to the old men, burns, bums, and those knobs and knolls named after some old broad's breasts. It's so old, I guess you get bored and start naming everything around you to keep it interesting. I've aged a year just watching the first damn round.

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