Woody Austin is awfully proud of himself for finishing second in a major. So proud in fact that he lost his mind, Rory Sabbatini and Stephen Ames style.

Austin talked like he'd actually won something at the PGA Championship. He babbled so much fact that he guaranteed himself a future beatdown - or three - by Tiger Woods in the near future.

Having shot a 67 in Sunday's final round to Tiger's 69, Austin crowed, "I beat him today." Later he argued that he's convinced that Tiger didn't even outplay him in the entire tournament, saying, "It just happens that he scored better." Which is a lot like Spinks arguing that it just so happened that Mike Tyson knocked him out in 91 seconds or Saddam Hussein's Republican Guard advancing the notion that they just so happened to surrender in five minutes even though they were sure they had the better army.

Austin wasn't done either.

His most idiotic statement may have come when he all but openly mocked Tiger's unmistakable aura of intimidation.

"I don't get that either," Austin said. "What, are we going to fight? Are we going to get into a fight? Why should I be intimidated?"

You can guarantee Austin will be intimidated when Woods gives him his version of the 9 and 8 drilling he put on Stephen Ames.

Really, when will these guys ever learn? Their macho fronting isn't fooling anybody. All it does is get them on Tiger's to-destroy list.

They really should just shut up and follow our own Tim McDonald's often hilarious advice on how to beat Tiger Woods in his column on the front of WorldGolf.com.

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