Annual Spring cleaning of golf equipment not as crazy as it sounds

By Clive Agran,
Contributor

Known to those who have golfed with him as just "Silky Swing," Clive Agran claims to be "arguably the most gifted golf writer either side of the Urals." Who are we to disagree? Clive pens this monthly WorldGolf.com column from his estate in England.

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It snowed in England (that's Old England not New England) at the weekend, which was particularly frustrating for me as I was confident that I would go out there and break 80 for the first time in many a long year. As it is, I slipped on the path and nearly broke my neck.

So, instead of playing golf I stayed at home and sorted through my golf equipment in what was something of an annual stocktaking exercise. I emptied my golf bag and a couple of drawers where I keep my golf gear and made a list of what I have. Not only that, but I broke everything down into categories.

For example, I have 188 golf balls, of which 38 are brand new, 74 are fine, 30 are just about usable and 46 are only good enough for practice. Interestingly, I have five pitch repairers, 12 ball markers, two gloves, one over-ripe banana and a hip flask.

Golf tees provided a particularly fascinating area of study. Would you believe that I have 492 tees; of which 98 are red, 54 are blue, 78 are yellow, 146 are white and 19 are green? The balance are a mix of colors that I wasn't able to sort out because my wife came into the room, looked at me, shook her head and said, "Very sad," before leaving.

That pulled me up short. So I stopped what I was doing and panicked. Was I indeed behaving strangely? Then it struck me - of course I was. What on earth was I doing sorting the tee pegs by color when the only thing that matters is size? Now I have them neatly in jars according to their length - short, medium and long. No wonder she thought I was crazy!

February 12, 2007

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