A Kissing Bandit can spice up Steve Stricker, FedEx Cup
Now listen, I understand that much of the audience for this blog will scream blasphemy and that it’s been a brilliant year for the PGA Tour. And I’m with you on that, but this is about entrenched golf fans. This is about the middle-of-the-road sports fan that needs a reason to watch golf.
And while the FedEx Cup may have become the most important golf event playoff thingy on the planet this year, it certainly isn’t bringing in the casual fans. There was an actual headline last weekend “Woods makes cut.” Oh yeah, that’ll get the youth audience. Generation Tiger, baby.
Then there’s the fact that Steve Stricker is doing his annual shoot-18-under-every-FedEx-Cup-Event run. And yeah, I get it, Stricker’s a great golfer, a consummate pro, nice to his dog. Blah. Blah. Blah. Let’s face it, we couldn’t sexy up Stricker if we stuck him in the middle of a hot tub full of Scarlett Johanssons.
Luckily for the PGA Tour, I’m a think-outside-of-the-box kinda guy. And I have one word for the PGA Tour to help them spice up the FedEx Cup - Morganna the Kissing Bandit. Ok, four words. It’s Morganna, she just can’t fit into a one-word description.
You see, now 62, Morganna has been in retirement, just a one-hour flight from Cog Hill. Get her out of retirement, have her run on the course and kiss Stricker. Bam, ratings through the roof.
Trust me on this. Morganna is a national treasure. Remember, for years she would bound onto baseball fields, and yet the religious right didn’t go wild. Here’s a woman whose body is plainly a sin, interrupting America’s pasttime, and no one seemed to mind. Because even more important than her biggest assets, she exuded happiness and fun. You couldn’t help but love Morganna. For whatever reason.
With but one kiss, Morganna could sexy up Steve Stricker and put the FedEx Cup on top of the ratings. Or at very least, we’ll all get a chance to see her again, and then come up with some other crazy ratings plan later.
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