Tom Watson winning the British Open would change everything

If Tom Watson manages to win the British Open, everything changes. Markets will open, credit will flow like wine and the ever-growing list of pain-in-the-ass despots around will get together and change their ways, sending the world a one-line note: “Hey everyone, sorry. We’ll cut all that out now.”

A Tom Watson victory at the British Open would be like the 1980 U.S. Hockey team plus Michael Phelps plus Susan Butcher winning four Iditarods (that one’s for you, “Real America.")

A 59-year-old American cleverly winning the Open would give the U.S. the pride it currently needs. Everything would get better. Don’t ask me how. Ask me why. Because Tom Watson showed us it could be done.

Of course, if Watson doesn’t win, we can expect the same crap until at least 2011, according to many economists. So, let’s all root for Tom, shall we?

–WKW