Sex and golf survey proves golfers , Lexus, USGA are all completely demented

As part of its promotion for last month’s U.S. Open, Lexus - official sponsor of the USGA - did a survey of golfers to find out just how into the game they really are.

The results: Golfers are completely demented.

The part of the survey that got noticed was that 43 percent of golfers would give up sex for a month in exchange for the perfect golf swing.

Now I don’t see that as being a big deal. We’ve all gone a month without sex. Who amongst us has had a perfect golf swing? Honestly, I find the 43 percent figure to be kind of low.

But then Lexus really started delving deeper into the twisted psyche of the average golfer:

• 22 percent would give up their hair for a perfect golf swing.
• 21 percent would give up their next raise.
• More than 40 percent have skipped church or family outings to golf.
• 30 percent would rather have a perfect golf swing than a perfect marriage.
• 22 percent say they are better at golf than they are in bed. Or driving a car.

What do we learn about golfers from this survey? Well, not much. We already knew we were twisted. But we do learn quite a bit about Lexus. Face it, they’re the Maxim of luxury car companies, sitting back in their huge offices giggling their asses off about the sex habits of golfers. These are the people the USGA chose to have as their sponsor?

At very least they offer a page with some golf instructional videos. That helps a bit in taking the creepy edge off their survey.

All in all, however, kind of a weak start for the USGA-Lexus marriage. Maybe things will get better next year, or maybe the USGA will just say to hell with it and sign up Hooters as a sponsor. Wait until you see that survey

–WKW