Jimmie Johnson's wrist injury more proof NASCAR drivers way dumber, smaller than golfers

Playing in a celebrity golf tournament in Lecanto, Fla., NASCAR champ Jimmie Johnson decided it would be wild fun to be on the roof of a moving golf cart. Of course, he fell off, breaking his wrist and then lied about it, telling reporters he was in the cart when he fell.

“Jimmie was horsing around and was on top of the golf cart when he fell off,” spokeswoman Kristine Curley told the Associated Press. “He wasn’t trying to deceive anyone and is sorry if anyone believes he was being untruthful.”

I suppose the equivalent of the NASCAR champ getting hurt on a golf cart would be Tiger Woods getting run over by Dale Earnhardt Jr. while practicing long irons on the track at Darlington.

So, while Johnson once again showed that race-car drivers aren’t the sharpest blade in the drawer, one other thing can be taken from this - NASCAR drivers are amazingly tiny. The guy was on the roof of a golf cart. The roof of an average golf cart couldn’t maintain the weight of Phil Mickelson’s left boob, yet Johnson’s up there golf cart surfing.

But that is something I could have told you from personal experience. Having been in the pits at a NASCAR race before, the average driver is about as big as a 12-year-old Filipino boy.

There are the exceptions, of course. Earnhardt being one, Michael Waltrip and Dale Jarrett are also big guys. But I could fit two Ward Burton’s in my front pocket. You could fit Jeff Gordon and every Bush brother you can find on the head of a pin.

So if Johnson’s fall from grace teaches you anything, let it be this: NASCAR drivers tend to be dumb as, and roughly the size of, the average brick.

This is Jeff Gordon’s actual size.

–WKW