Welcome everyone to “Overblown, Out-of-Context Theatre,” the blog where we take a random snippet of conversation from someone famous, and make a huge issue where none really exists. Today, we take a look at a recent comment made by Tiger Woods, on the passing of golf great Byron Nelson. Overblown, Out-of-Context Theatre When asked about his memories of Byron Nelson, here’s something Tiger Woods had to say: “He was so alert and so sharp, even late in his ages. I mean, he would have a very articulate conversation with you, and you don’t find that with people at his age, being that sharp ...

Back when I was a child actor, big things were expected of me. Every blue moon someone will come up and ask “Hey, weren’t you that kid in Bugsy Malone?” I’m forced to say yes, and the memories come flooding back. Mostly of what a little bitch Jodie Foster was. William K. Wolfrum (left) next to Scott Baio in the film “Bugsy Malone.” Anyway, it saddened me that my career tanked not long after. I did a guest starring role on “TJ Hooker” as William Shatner’s illegitimate, long-lost kid, then several years later starred in an ill-advised German porn called “Wolf-RAM!” before ...

Get ready for the USC Baseball Classic Golf Tournament, coming Nov. 20 at the Dove Canyon Country Club in Dove Canyon in Southern California. The cost is $375 per person or $1,500 for a foursome. The entry fee includes continental breakfast, lunch, deluxe tee prizes, golfing with a celebrity in each group and post-tournament awards dinner. Past tournaments have seen a cavalcade of stars like Mark Prior and Aaron Boone, while this year fans are hoping to be delighted by the presence of more great former Trojans’ stars, with the possibility of them holding pre-tournament seminars. On the wish list: – 2005 ...

The one thing that’s made the Golfer Supremacy Rankings the most important and relevant golf rankings system in the world today is our unbridled enthusiasm and positivity. This makes up for our complete inability to add. So while the rest of the nation spends its energy bashing the U.S. team for its performance at the 2006 Ryder Cup, we chose to look at the bright side of life. Sure, we could call the U.S. team a bunch of spoiled, slothful, uninspired, dumbbell, poopyheads, but where would that get us? Instead, we try to look at positive performances by Americans. Like ...

Rumors that Osama bin Laden has died have been running rampant in the news the past few days. Reportedly the evil, bearded one fell dead from typhoid, or ennui, or something like that in the latest of his caves. Of course, who can forget the time he died in Jan. 2002? Or when he ceased living in July of 2002? Or when his 72 smoking-hot virgins welcomed him in June 2005? Or in Dec. 2005? Osama bin Laden has basically become the Elvis of terrorists. Soon, there will be sightings of him pumping gas while dead in Des Moines. Plus, I hear ...

Dear President Bush, While I understand that you are a busy man that works day and night single-handedly keeping the nation safe from the endless marauding hordes of Islamonazifascistmurderingpedofiles, they currently seem to have their attention diverted by the Pope, so everything should be all clear for at least the weekend. Mr. President, I write to you because the U.S. is facing a terrible dilemma. The U.S. team is about to lose the Ryder Cup to Europe for the fifth time in sixth tries. This will continue a string of embarrassing defeats for United States sporting teams, most recently the U.S. women’s ...

For myself, one of the great, unintended consequences of technology is that I have gone completely and totally bonkers with listening to books on tape. If someone is reading something and saving me the time, I’m all over it. Over the past few weeks I’ve listened to Dante’s Inferno (Judas finds out that defying Christ is a seriously bad idea); Stephen Hawking’s “Brief History of Time” (The universe is big. Really big.); and Sun Tzu’s “The Art of War” (Like the “War on Terror” except totally opposite in every way). Of course, I mention those out of some vague hope they’ll impress ...

Coming soon to a theater near you … Ryder! Voice Over: In a world of chaos, two teams come together for a battle on a golf course in Ireland. They thought they were just playing for the Ryder Cup, but between the first drive and the final putt, lies will be told, evil will surface, and heroes will emerge. Ryder! VO: Starring Tiger Woods as the greatest living multi-celled organism in the history of oxygen: This one’s for you Dad! VO: Co-starring Darren Clarke, as the gritty Irishman, fighting his way through heartbreak: This one’s for you, Heather! VO: With Chris DiMarco as the never-say-die underdog: This one’s for ...

We here at the Golfer Supremacy Rankings hereby demand a full, unconditional apology from Pope Benedict XVI for his recent insinuation that we are a “golf rankings of hate.” We find this proclamation to be hurtful, shortsighted and somewhat perplexing to the point that we wonder if we heard him correctly. Nonetheless, should our demands not be met, we will be forced to frantically wave our hands in the air and then repeat the demands, in even sterner tones. Plus, we won’t stop pointing out how much he looks like the evil emperor from Star Wars: Golfer Supremacy Rankings 1. Paul Casey Comments: Casey ...

With both Michelle Wie and Tiger Woods sitting at home this weekend, one would imagine that all golf news would come to a grinding halt. It didn’t. Color us surprised. Golf in the News “Michelle Wie Keeps Finishing Last” The Source: Deadspin.com Summary: Someone named Hugh Johnson calls TravelGolf.com’s Tim McDonald some names, then gives his opinion on Michelle Wie playing in PGA events on sponsor’s exemptions. The opinion: “Meh, whatever.” Nut Graph: “The good news is that she was only two strokes worse than someone named Todd Hamilton, just five strokes worse than Justin Leonard, and just six strokes worse than John Daly.” Analysis: Someone ...

There are a slew of great things about golf that true fans recognize. Of course, there’s the professional game, where we get to see players like Tiger Woods and Annika Sorenstam do things in competition that shatter our minds. For most, the main thrill of golf is much more personal. Face it, there’s no way to adequately describe to a non-golfer the thrill and feelings of inner satisfaction of breaking 100. Or 90. Or 80. Or even scoring a par or birdie on a tough hole. Still, there’s one other thing golf has recently shown that it brings to the table for ...

I see hating people. They’re everywhere. They walk around like everyone else and don’t know they’re haters. Nonetheless, the haters are out there. Fo’ shizzle. In golf, Michelle Wie is putting the finishing touches on a year that has taken her from the most beloved young player in the game to the most hated by the haters. Yesterday, a TravelGolf.com column “Who’s the culprit in the obsessive Michelle Wie circus: the sports media or golf fans?” there were 16 comments. Every one of them negative. “I would be very happy never to hear her name again! Great golf is being played by many ...

Being the CEO of the Golfer Supremacy Rankings is an imposing job with innumerable responsibilities. Way too many to mention here. But in the end, we will do whatever it is necessary to keep our stockholders happy. So we’re not that upset we were left off Golf Digest’s list of the Top-200 CEO golfers. We say it’s about time that CEO’s get credit for more than war-profiteering, wide-scale layoffs, obscene salaries, labor violations and other perks that come with being Satan’s bag boy on a daily basis. So we’ll humbly stay under the radar and give credit to some golfers who are ...

A while back, Golf for Beginners’ Stacy and Barry Solomon brought up the issue of why bloggers have such a hard time getting media credentials to pro golf tournaments. It was the sort of thing that created an interesting debate, with people seemingly split on what role bloggers play in the world of professional sports coverage. Now, personally, I stayed out of it, because I didn’t feel the debate applied to me. Sure, I write a blog, but I have plenty of experience in the mainstream media as a sports writer, as well. I’ve covered professional and major college sporting events, ...

Few human beings, let alone golf bloggers, have captured the imagination of the public like WorldGolf.com’s Dot Wong. She’s long, she’s lean, she loves ellipses. Of course, the public (you know who you are) always wants more of a good thing. Because you’re a greedy, greedy public, aren’t you? Sadly, despite high demand, supply of the Wongtastic one remains low, because: a) We’re a bunch of teases, and b) Dot’s a mysterious girl that can be hard to track down. But your pal Blog-Boy Billy here has found a little something to further whet your Dot-petite: Being Dot Wong: Dot goes golfing ...

Here at the Golfer Supremacy Rankings we know a story when we see one. Tiger Woods and Annika Sorenstam winning events? Been there, done that. Nike and B.J., squeezing every last cent out of Michelle Wie at another men’s event? So what. No, the story here is Kang, and how he can now walk proudly amongst his peers, knowing full well that he is Ji-Man. Golfer Supremacy Rankings 1. Kang Ji-Man Comments: Kang recently won the Shinhan Donghae Open Golf Championship, his first career victory. The moment was beautifully recorded by Donga.com, in a sort of “All your base are belong to us” translation ...

Many of us woke up this morning to a world not quite as good as it was when we went to sleep the night before. Steve Irwin, the famous “Crocodile Hunter,” died Monday a.m. after being stung by a stingray in a marine accident off Australia’s north coast. Irwin, the director of the Australian Zoo in Queensland, was 44 and leaves a wife and two children. While Irwin understood that his shtick could annoy some - especially in his homeland - what was truly endearing about the man was that, as years progressed, you realized it wasn’t a shtick. Irwin was ...

Once again proving that they are the best basketball players in the world - except for shooting, defense, playing as a team or actually winning anything - the U.S. men’s national basketball team lost to Greece, 101-95 at the FIBA World Championships, and will leave Japan with at best a bronze medal. In losing to Greece, a team without a current NBA Player, the Americans showed that the league’s slogan “NBA Action: It’s Fan-tastic” should have an addendum of: “But it sure isn’t quality basketball.” So while LeBron James, Dwayne Wade, Carmelo Anthony and the rest under Coach Mike Krzyzewski will continue ...