When the Golfer Supremacy Rankings debuted in 1995, the first edition was titled “What a Mustache Ride! Corey Pavin wins the U.S. Open!” It was a great way to break our cherry, and now Pavin is back on top and we couldn’t be more turned on. We’re only upset we couldn’t cram a few more random sexual innuendos into this first paragraph. Golfer Supremacy Rankings 1. Karrie Webb Comments: Webb once again added to her LPGA hall-of-fame resume by winning the Evian Masters, holding off both young - Michelle Wie, Lorena Ochoa - and old - Laura Davies. Aside from further cementing her ...

You’re Corey Pavin and you’re one round from your first victory in a decade. You’ve single-handedly put the U.S. Bank Championship in Milwaukee in the news, much to the chagrin of the hate-filled mainstream media. And we salute you for it. Corey Pavin Appreciation Blog – Winner of the 1995 U.S. Open. – One-time owner of a mustache that made 1970s porn stars like Ron Jeremy exclaim: “Damn! That is one bad-ass mustache!” – Has taken him years to regain the mystical powers the ’stache had bestowed on him after finally shaving it off. – Has set the record for lowest nine-hole score at the U.S. ...

I’m not such a cold person. I love good things, and flowers and puppy dogs and rainbows. I want Floyd Landis to be found to have done nothing at all wrong and be cheered as a hero. I want Charles Barkley to become the governor of Alabama, and make things better for people there. I want Roy Jones Jr. to beat the chump he’s fighting over the weekend and retire with dignity. And I want Michelle Wie to win the Evian Masters. I want her to win because I want to see the Wie Warriors just lose it. And because I want to ...

Some random thoughts: So who will be golf’s first Floyd Landis - the Tour de France winner that was reportedly found to have an abnormally high testosterone level? At this point you’d just have to throw out all known rules of humanity to think there isn’t someone on one of the pro tours gacked up on roids. Landis is a tough case, though. He insists he’s innocent, and he just seems so sincere that most of us are rooting for him. Though that once again puts fans in the morbid position of rooting for a blood and/or urine test. Landis has a tough ...

Few things must be stranger than being in a hugely popular boy band and having women throw themselves at you constantly, all the while you aren’t interested. Such appears to be the fate of ‘N SYNC’s Lance Bass, who, aside from having an astronaut fixation, has admitted to People Magazine that he’s gay. The admission is likely to shock few, but it still couldn’t have been easy for someone with a fan base larger than most. Obviously, he’s taking a huge chance with his future career, especially in movies (remember Rupert Everett?) So if someone like Bass can take the plunge, will there ...

In the not-so-distant future: Daddy? Yes, son? Who is Tiger Woods? Well, he wins a lot of golf tournaments, son. What? He’s one major victory away from breaking the record for all-time majors. Huh? He’s the one that gives all that money to charity. Ummm … You know that crying bald guy we see on TV most Sunday afternoons? That’s him. Oh, him. And when will Michelle Wie win a tournament? Oh, very soon, son. Keep in mind, she’s only 24. For her age, 121 Top-5 finishes is amazing. Daddy, can I have a snack? No son, the law is very strict about this. No eating after 6 p.m., it’s ...

Sitting around the cooler here at the Golfer Supremacy Rankings, the conversation normally works its way around to blowing things up. Like how Tiger Woods blew up the field with his driver in the bag. Or how Nike is likely prepared to blow up the image of a young golfer named Jenny Shin. Or how no one, and we mean no one, is going to blow up Byron Nelson. Not when a Texan is President, at least. Golfer Supremacy Rankings 1. Tiger Woods Comments: Was there any doubt that Tiger would bounce back with an exceptional performance at the British Open? Well, ...

A while back, looking to have a little irresponsible fun at the expense of others, I wrote a piddling little blog about a decision by the Ottumwa, Iowa city council allowing deer hunting on local golf courses. For me, it was mainly an opportunity to use the following line: “Perhaps Ottumwa is just completely overrun with deer, but I didn’t see anybody asking about whether shooting golfers was cool or not. I demand answers. Because, my friends, it starts out with a 38-handicapper getting capped in Ottumwa, and will end with Phil Mickelson getting landmined at Pebble Beach.” Now I imagined that ...

The initial recorded time that someone made the comment that the U.S. was headed to hell in a hand basket came on July 5, 1776, in a New York Times’ editorial titled “John Hancock: Why an ego-maniac with big handwriting shows America is doomed.” That it was right next to the editorial “Stem cells aren’t babies! What are you, a friggin’ idiot?!” also made it the first time the Times was blasted as being a liberal mouthpiece, but that’s neither here nor there. The point is that people have been talking about the decay of the United States since the “States” ...

The first time I remember being enthralled by the anticipation of a sporting event was in Sept. 1981. Sugar Ray Leonard and Thomas Hearns stood at opposite sides of the ring for endless, delicious moments as they prepared to finally engage in what would be one of the great fistfights of their generation. Obviously, it’s a rarity for a sporting event to reach that level of greatness, but that remains beside the point. It is the buildup that gets to us, the time leading up to a big event where anything is possible. The British Open has that type of buildup. ...

The dedicated staff at the GSR’s were all 16 once. Young, impressionable, bulletproof and complete emotional wrecks 92 percent of the time. Luckily for us, we didn’t have to do much on a national stage at that time. That would have just been catostrophic. But perhaps we’re just weak. Or unlucky that we were raised by parents instead of business managers. Golfer Supremacy Rankings 1. B.J. Wie Comments: So, you say your 16-year-old daughter has a unique and marketable talent? Why not pimp it for all it’s worth? There’s money to be made, and heck, she’s tall, so therefore she must be emotionally mature ...

Here at the Golfer Supremacy Rankings, we love nothing more than seeing a young female player give a Zidane head butt to the chest to her competition and get a breakthrough win. Here’s to you Brittany Lincicome. And while we’re at it, we applaud the endless, misspelled variations of your name that will soon prop up on the Internet: So great work, Britney Linkicome. Fantastic effort, Britany Lankycomet. Atta girl, Bri Lunkytrunky. You da man, Britney Licilici. Etc. Golf Supremacy Rankings 1. Brittany Lincicome Comments: She’s blond, she’s young, she’s babelicious and she just beat Michelle Wie, topped Lorena Ochoa and trounced Juli Inkster to win the HSBC ...

I readily admit I’m not the best at sharing my feelings. I do my best to be an open book and am willing to admit anything - like my current mancrush on Zinedine Zidane, for instance. After some brief self-analyzing, however, I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m not so much emotionally cold, but, in fact, exceedingly shallow. Caption: This was may be a poor picture of Zidane to have picked after admitting having a sporting mancrush on him. Occasionally I can recognize actual emotions, though, and this weekend, there will be three different events which will showcase emotion in athletes in different and ...

Because it was only a matter of time before someone stooped this low, Gadot Biochemical Industries brings us that new beverage craze: Golf Tea. Golf Tea. GET IT????!!!! Yes, Golf Tea. The first tea product that allows its marketers to use phrases like: “Everyone knows you can’t play a round of golf without a tee, so for the next round, plan to tee off fully hydrated with the finest tea in the world.” I wonder what Richard H. Davis, President of Beverage Marketing USA, Inc., thinks about Golf Tea. “Golf Tea may also help improve your over-all game because proper hydration and concentration are ...

If you’re American like I am, you can’t get through a sentence without using the word freedom. The freedom to talk about my freedom is one of the most freeing things in my free life. Of course, while talking about freedom is great, actually taking advantage of those freedoms is even better. Which is why now is the time to take advantage of a freedom. The Internet, our little meeting place, will be changing soon, my friends. And don’t get me wrong, I’m no expert on things like the very real potential of a two-tiered Internet price plan or what role ICANN ...

At the Golfer Supremacy Rankings we strive for fairness. We also strive to bake the best damned chocolate-chip cookie you’ll ever taste and hope you rush out to buy a box or two of the new Golfer Supremacy Rankings Chocolate Chip Delights when they come to a supermarket near you this Fall. But back to fairness. The U.S. Women’s Open was a sensational battle between two women. Yet one of these women - Annika Sorenstam - is getting the lion’s share of the press, while Michelle Wie gets even more attention for coming close to winning. And that leaves Pat Hurst out ...