The Golfer Supremacy Rankings accept that not everything can be beautiful. Sadly, some tournaments have a winner who finishes over par. Just like some soccer games finish 0-0.

This doesn’t take away from the event, however. In fact, some times a lack of beauty can be beautiful. Are you following? You see, like in the U.S. Open, sure the scores got high, but the end result was still quite interesting. Hence, it can be beautiful. Right?

Oh screw it. Here’s a picture of smoking-hot R&B singer Rihanna to help us get back on track:

Rihanna: Prior to now she
was rarely included in golf blogs.

Golfer Supremacy Rankings

1. Geoff Ogilvy

Comments: Expecting to finish second, Ogilvy got his major when Lefty got all crazy on the final hole. Instead, Ogilvy is U.S. Open champ, and the first Australian major winner in more than a decade.

And remember, a certain writer picked an Australian to win the U.S. Open. This one, vaguely correct pick makes up for the 1,600 consecutive bad predictions made on these pages.

2. Tiger Woods

Comments: When future generations think of the 2006 U.S. Open, they won’t think of it as the major Ogilvy won, or the major that Mickelson threw away. They’ll remember it as the major where Tiger missed the cut.

In the U.K., it will be remembered as “the closest Colin Montgomerie ever got.”

3. Phil Mickelson

Comments: Lefty’s 18th hole hell was hard to watch and hard for Mickelson himself to understand.

“I still am in shock that I did that. I just can’t believe that I did that,” Mickelson said. “I am such an idiot.”

Moments later, the American Association of Idiots held a press conference to lament Mickelson’s insensitive words. Fortunately for Phil, the AAI didn’t invite any one to the press conference and kept referring to Mickelson as “Shaq.”

Random factoid: In reality there is no American Association of Idiots. In the U.S., the organization that would most closely resemble the AAI would be Congress.