An open letter to all golfers entering the LPGA Mizuno Classic
As you all know, your efforts to triumph over Annika Sorenstam are similar to efforts made by your male counterparts on the PGA tour when competing against Tiger Woods.
Here are some tips on how to defeat Annika Sorenstam.
1. All must agree that those playing with Sorenstam must be willing to bend the rules of etiquette. This means they must come supplied with weaponry other than their sticks.
2. One of those in the grouping must make believe that they have a very bad cold. They must also be willing to sneeze and cough loudly in Annika’s backswing.
3. One of the LPGA players who are yet to tee off must bring an airhorn and position herself out-of-sight, blowing said airhorn when Annika is going for a birdie or eagle putt. Everyone in her grouping should also grind their spikes into her putting line on a regular basis.
4. Furthermore, bring duplicate numbers for the leaderboard and change those numbers as Annika approaches to make her believe that she is either so far in the lead that she doesn’t have to be concerned with her play or so far behind that she plays too aggressively.
5. If all this doesn’t work, then you may have to resort to uglier tactics such as letting Sorenstam trip over your feet when walking down the fairway or spiking her food with Visine to give her the “runs".
If all this fails, at least LPGA ratings will go through the roof!
With the possibility that Sorenstam still manages to prevail and win her sixth Mizuno trophy, next time bring Kryptonite!
To all of you out there who would be silly enough to take this seriously, we want to wish Annika, as well as all participants at the Mizuno Classic, a great competitive tournament! ;D
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6 comments
How about simply: 'be Lorena Ochoa'?
Annika is the only top 5 ranked player in the field.
Her highest ranked opponent will be Ai Miyazato.
If anyone is to beat Annika it will jhave to be done
without being Lorena Ochoa, or being as good as Lorena.
omprove on her first round score if she wants to win this thing.
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