Jesus, Moses, and an old man are playing golf.
Moses tees up and hits his ball into the water trap. Nonplussed he goes over to the lake, parts the water with his club and hits the ball onto the green.
Jesus tees up next and also manages to land in the water trap where the ball curiously floats. So he walks down to the lake, across the water, and hits his ball out onto the green.
Last to tee up is the old man whose ball also heads straight for the water. As the ball hits the surface of the water a fish jumps up and swallows it and is immediately grabbed by an eagle which deposits the fish on the green. The ball shoots out of the fish’s mouth and rolls into the cup.
Jesus turns around and says, “Nice shot Dad, but would you quit messing around and play golf?”
The Pope met with his Cardinals to discuss a proposal from Ehud Olmert, acting Prime Minister of Israel. “Your Holiness,” said one of his Cardinals, “Mr. Olmert wants to challenge you to a game of golf thereby showing our friendship and the ecumenical spirit that we both share in the Jewish and Catholic faiths.”
The Pope thought this was a good idea, but he had never held a golf club in his hand. “Don’t we have a Cardinal to represent me?” he asked. “None that plays very well,” said a Cardinal. “But,” he added, “there is a man named Jack Nicklaus, an American golfer who is a devout Catholic. We can offer to make him a Cardinal, then ask him say to play Mr. Olmert and he would be your personal representative. In addition to showing our spirit of cooperation, we’ll also win the match.”
Everyone agreed it was a good idea. The call was made. Of course, Jack was honored and agreed to play.
The day the match was completed, Nicklaus reported to the Vatican to inform the Pope of the result. “I have some good news and some bad news, your Holiness,” said Nicklaus. “Tell me the good news first, Cardinal Nicklaus,” said the Pope. “Well, your Holiness, I don’t like to brag, but even though I’ve played some pretty terrific rounds of golf in my life, this was the best I have ever played. I must have been inspired from above. My drives were long and true, my irons were accurate and purposeful, and my putting was perfect. With all due respect, my play was truly miraculous.”
“There’s bad news?", the Pope asked.
“Yes,” Nicklaus sighed. “I lost by three strokes to Rabbi Tiger Woods.”
Barry and I would like to wish everyone both a Happy Passover and Happy Easter!
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WorldGolf.com's Golf for Beginners podcast features golf tips and advice from tour pros and experts. Hosts Stacy and Barry blend personal anecdotes with tips on equipment and instruction from tour professionals and magazines in this weekly podcast.
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