Five things I guarantee will happen in 2009 - including Rocco defeating Tiger Woods

Before I bust out my party hat and bottle of Andre’ for New Year’s Eve, it’s time to look into the crystal ball for 2009. I see a lot of strange things happening in the world of professional golf. Here are five things I guarantee will happen. Call your bookies now.

- Sergio Garcia will win a major. I said earlier this year Garcia had a great 2008 season and would turn it into a major before he turns 30. Well, at the end of 2009 he turns 30. If I had to point to a major to double down on, it’d be the British Open.

- The Masters will be back. The last two Masters have been pretty forgetful unless you’re South African or a corn bred Iowan. I’m not taking anything away from Zach Johnson or Trevor Immelman, but Augusta National hasn’t been the exciting course it became famous for, especially on the back nine Sunday.

But I’m predicting the committee will finally stop trying to be the U.S. Open Jr. and set the course up for a meaty, 12-under winner next year, with at least a quarter of the field in red numbers.

Or if the jackets don’t oblige, the Man upstairs will usher in perfect, calm and soft scoring conditions that week of April. Everyone is hungry for an exciting finish.

- Michelle Wie won’t win a pro tournament. If she couldn’t win Q-school, she won’t win on the LPGA Tour just yet even with a tour card. The fields are simply too deep now and she’s been lapped.

I also predict she will accept a sponsor’s exemption on a men’s tour and compete, and an analyst will looked shocked and suggest it might not be best for her development at the present time.

On a related subject, Lorena Ochoa’s hold on No. 1 will slip, but it won’t be Paula Creamer taking her over.

It will be Ji-Yai Shin, so long as she competes enough in North America, which I think she will.

- Rocco defeats Tiger: The two stars of the summer will square off in a rematch of their epic showdown when they meet sometime during the 2009 schedule. But this time Rocco will emerge victorious, giving this unlikeliest of rivalries a happy ending for the little guy.

Now, this duel might happen at a poker table or a dart board, but it will happen and Rocco will win.

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