PGA Merchandise Show fashion winners and losers

ORLANDO - Never fear everyone, B Tuck is back to bring some sense into golf’s fashion world. I feel like fashion has taken over the PGA Show this year, practically half the space seems dedicated to apparel.

And that’s a good thing, because that means more cute models running around the show floor. Here’s a few notes from the fashion wing.

-Patterns and stripes are out in golf shirts. Solids, with either colored shoulders or sides are in.

- Cotton has been kicked to the curb in favor of new micro fabrics like ClimaCool that feel like mesh. I suppose they are lighter and allows for a better swing, but it also means that most golf shirts can really only be used for golf. I would never go to the bar in any of these shirts.

- In it’s second year in golf, Puma is continuing to challenge the status quo in golf fashion and especially shoes. They’ve released a golf shoe that has over 30 spikes that bore into the shoe, they are not replaceable and promise a two-year warranty. The left and right shoe feature different bottoms because “the left and right foot do different things in the golf swing". The shoe has a sharp design and is one of the lightest on the market.

- Under Armour continues its deep dive into the golf market. Yes, the Under Armour that has those really intense football commercials full of screaming and sweating. Their display for their golf line blares Rage Against the Machine at the entrance way, but the line seems pretty tame compared to their overall sports marketing scheme. I also think that Puma, Adidas and IZod have flashier clothes for the young folk. They’ve also released a line of golf gloves, which I didn’t think fit as snug as my mainstays Foot Joy and Etonic.

- Sweater vests are totally in, especially argyle and other more subtle patterns.

- Can someone get the pink female mannequin outside the Polo display a sweater? She’s been shamelessly “nipping out” all show.

- Those one-piece, tennis-style dresses, like Michelle Wie wears a lot, are hardly anywhere this year. Last year a ton of brands featured them. It makes sense to me, I don’t know any women who would want to draw that kind of attention to themselves on the course. Maybe it’s different on the west coast.

- The Loudmouth Golf Guys are back, who shamelessly stormed the final round at the U.S. Open at Oakmont last summer. I don’ think their pants look all that vintage. They look like a mix between modern-day European flash and a 70s LSD trip. The only way you’ll get me in a pair of these pants is if you’ve got some seriously incriminating blackmail.