PGA Show littered with energy drinks for golfers

ORLANDO - I’m sitting here in my Orlando hotel room looking at three, 2 oz. shots of competing energy drinks that are on display at the PGA Merchandise Show this week.

I’m kind of bored, so I’m thinking about taking all three shots at once.

Before I do so and end up either hugging the toilet or on an all-night parkour session, let me compare and contrast the three for you.

5-hour ENERGY promises hours of energy instantly, no crash later, and is sugar free.

Tee SHOTS Energy Drink promises enhanced focus and no jitters or crash.

Not to be confused with the above, T-SHOT Energy promises pain relief, lower scores and pain relief. It doesn’t say anything about being sugar-free.

Each contain between 20-30 mgs of Niacin. Each also contain gratuitous use of CAPS LOCK.

Each also believe golfers need energy. Each apparently do not believe a morning banana (honestly, who doesn’t feel GREAT in the morning after a banana?) is enough for Today’s Golfer.

Each of these drinks have warning labels. Banana’s don’t have warning labels.

On a side note, I was at Disney earlier this week and noticed that most gift shops were now stocked with Red Bull, to which I asked myself, “Are little kids drinking Red Bull at Disney World?” To which I follow-up asked myself, “If kids are chugging Red Bull at Disney World, does this have anything to do with the fact parents now keep their children on leashes in theme parks?”