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I've got a surefire golf invention idea, who wants to make millions with me?

Friday July 27, 2007 | 05:01:27 pm 324 words, 3213 views  

I am looking for a prospective partner to help design and market a new golf invention that will revolutionize the way we all practice.

Here’s my pitch:

So I’m at the range yesterday, bangin’ balls, and I realize I’ve reached the bottom of my bucket before I’m satisfied with my swing.

Who hasn’t had this problem?

You don’t want to go buy a whole new bucket - you just want to hit a dozen more shots. You already checked the top of the ball machine to see if it’s unlocked…but it’s not. If you want more balls, you’re gonna have to pay (but the $5 you have in your wallet is already reserved for a 6-piece McNugget meal on the way home).

Just beyond the little yellow rope, there are hundreds of balls, taunting you. But how pathetic does it look when a grown man is tip-toeing around no-man’s-land hoping the assistant pros don’t catch you? You’re a liability out there - it’s just another morsel of our innocence all the insurance companies have stripped forever.

I have the solution: The Giant Range Rake™. It fits into your bag much like a ball retriever would - only the top folds out into an expansive rake - like a majestic peacock spreads its feathers. The metal rod extends up to 10 yards (15 for the deluxe version).

So when you’ve reached the end of your bucket, don’t risk getting humiliated by the 15-year-old cart boy as he chases you off. Instead, pull out your Giant Range Rake™ and haul in about 20 more balls with one swift and efficient motion.

We will charge $19.99 for the standard, $24.99 for the deluxe. It’s a sound investment for any frugal golfer.

I just need an engineer to help me design it. I can outsource the labor to Asia somewhere and should have good margins. We’ll get it patented for sure.

I anticipate your emails. Let’s make millions and I can quit this dreadful golf writing job.

Permalink 3 comments

Comments, Pingbacks:

Comment from: Ron Mon [Member]
I'm in. You're a whiz.
PermalinkPermalink 07/27/07 @ 17:22
Comment from: Dave Marrandette [Visitor]
Why would you want to practice? Man-up and go play the game.
PermalinkPermalink 07/28/07 @ 09:19
Comment from: Golf Goddess [Visitor]
Two things make us laugh out loud: "If you want balls, you're gonna have to pay $5," and "The rod extends up to 10 yards." But sex jokes aside, screwing the range sounds great.
PermalinkPermalink 08/24/07 @ 01:04

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Brandon Tucker Brandon Tucker

a WorldGolf.com Blog

WorldGolf.com blogger Brandon Tucker offers his unique perspective on golf and travel destinations from Scotland and Ireland to Myrtle Beach. He also chimes in on news events on the PGA and LPGA Tours, Tiger Woods, Phil Mickelson and other happenings around the world of golf.