Faldo passes on Champions Tour, Love and Ochoa win, Owens beaten to death by media - weekend in review

Anyone else notice the NHL regular season kicked off this weekend?

Tumbleweed blows by…so quiet you can hear David Allen Coe on the jukebox…grizzled drunk at the bar tells me to, “knock off that jive!"…"We don’t serve Molson here, I’m sorry,” notes the bartender as he motions to the exit…

Sooooo, I guess there’s other stuff going on in golf and sports then!

Ochoa wins in Mexico, enchilladas for everyone! There’s nothing like winning in front of a home crowd. Lorena Ochoa won in her native Mexico Sunday, adding to a fine 2006 campaign that currently has her on top of the LPGA money list. Cuervo was passed around like it was Navidad and cliff divers spontaneously hurled themselves off jagged rock formations in joy.

We also saw the Detroit Tigers throw a Comerica Park party for the ages after shocking the world against the Yankees. Skipper Jim Leyland was kissing fans, Rookies Curtis Granderson and Joel Zumaya, barely of legal drinking age, were spraying champagne on the Tiger faithful. Detroit sports sure know how to play “spoiler", stunning the L.A. Lakers in 2004 and now the Yankees this weekend.

Detroit, thanks largely in part to its fans, is the best sports town in America. The golf ain’t bad, either.

Faldo opts for the booth: Nick Faldo choosing to be a full-time commentator for CBS while at the fruitful age of 50 shows the Champions’ Tour has all the relevance of an Air Supply reunion concert. Ratings for the tour have slumped drastically, and with the rise of the LPGA Tour, it won’t be long before the tour loses almost all TV coverage. I wish I could be excited about Champions Tour superstar Loren Roberts. How many majors did he win again?

In fact, only one player in the Top 10 in money has won a major (Tom Kite) which poses the question, “‘Champions’ of what?”

Love finds a way at Greensboro: Inconceivably snubbed out of the Ryder Cup team in favor of “Some Dude” and “That Guy", Davis Love III won at Greensboro this weekend. Does this mean if Love III had played in the Ryder Cup the U.S. wins? Yes, yes it does. The moon is also comprised of a delicious gouda, as well.

Sure, Love isn’t the force he once was, but he’s still easily among the U.S.’s ten best options in the event, whether the point system proves it or not.

Owens loses in Philly: This story has already been beaten to death thanks to ESPN and other bandwagon columnists. You’d think Saddam Hussein was returning to one of his Iraqi Palaces for a leisurely spa getaway.

Take this statement to the bank: Florida State will not have another good season (10-3 or better) until offensive coordinator Jeff Bowden - who has neutered the offense out of all the swagger and talent FSU is normally known for - is kindly nudged off a plank. Might not happen until daddy Bowden hangs em up. Expect Urban Meyer and No. 2 Florida to rule the Sunshine State for years to come.

Publicity Stunt sure to unfold in the next three months: Now you can box Paris Hilton in the ring!

Fresh of Hilton’s cat fight in L.A. last week, you can now enter the sweepstakes to fight the Diva at the Rio in Vegas. To enter, you must be female (men’s contest where you can enter to appear in video with Paris coming soon…), have real hot accessories, have dissed another girl in the past week for being a “ho". When you order drinks at a bar, you do it with attitude, and your best friend recently caught you making whoopy with her boyfriend in a night club bathroom stall. Are YOU bitchy enough???