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"Stillwell angel, have another chocolate bar"

Monday December 13, 2004 | 18:55:15 299 words, 3330 views  

Is someone filming the Lakers for an upcoming reality series and not telling us?

I didn’t know much of Karl Malone when he was with Utah. I did know he had a tight-shorts sidekick and an “Oh man the mail IS being delivered on Sunday!” cliche that followed him around on NBC. I also recall him losing his cool after forgetting Michael Jordan isn’t allowed to be whistled for traveling or pushing off.

But from what I have seen lately from “Newman", Karl’s career change from Iron Man to Punching Bag has been nothing short of a “bummer".

It appears the old saying “You only get more pissed-off at Kobe with age” is ringing true. Talk about a bad move going to L.A. I have often considered a voyage to La La Land somewhere down the road to maybe chase a far-off dream of some sort. Now, I’m thinking I have a better chance fulfilling that dream somewhere beneath my desk.

Karl, Karl, Karl. . .You should know by now that Kobe, like a spoiled, chubby rugrat who thinks it’s a good idea for a third helping of chocolate fudge, always gets his way (see: Shaq, Phil, and the United States Judicial System). I know Vanessa Bryant is a looker. In fact, if I had the chance I’d probably make a pass at her too regardless the level of beat-down likely to ensue. But frankly the team is about three years away from being renamed “Kobe Presents: The Los Angeles Kobe’s".

As for Karl, the family man, he’ll probably try and justify his actions. He’ll say, “I wasn’t hitting on her, I was simply inquiring of the next time she’ll be in the bathtub. Lonely". But it won’t matter. What was said won’t matter. Because Kobe wants more fudge.

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Comments, Pingbacks:

Comment from: Heights Hipster [Visitor]
Brandon - I know you are from Michigan; so how could you forget the Malone massacre of Isiaah Thomas? Poor Zeke was elbowed in the face and required 11 stitches above the eye. What goes down, comes around.
PermalinkPermalink 2004-12-17 @ 18:30

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Brandon Tucker Brandon Tucker

a WorldGolf.com Blog

WorldGolf.com's Brandon Tucker offers his unique perspective on golf and travel destinations from Scotland and Ireland to Myrtle Beach. He also chimes in on news events on the PGA and LPGA Tours, Tiger Woods, Phil Mickelson and other happenings around the world of golf.